Sometime It Really IS OK to Complain!

Hello Hump Day Readers … and before you blast that title, think about complaints, the ones you hear and the ones you share. Take a moment to re-read in your mind the words spoken, what do you see in them? I know the Scriptures remind us to “quit our complaining and whining” but let’s go to the Webster definitions of complaint, complain/complaining and find a deeper meaning:

NOUN: “The expressions of discomfort, unease, pain, or grief.”

VERB:  Complains/complaining is the singular form of the verb “complain.” It means “to express unease or discomfort, to lament.”

What does this mean for us? It means that our laments are a way for us to express ourselves because if we “can’t get the hurt out” it stays inside and eats away at us. What we need to do is turn to God with our laments and I can’t think of a better start than to open the Psalms. Why? Athanasius, the great4th century Church Father quoted: “The Psalms have a unique place in the Bible because [whereas] most of Scripture speaks to us, the Psalms speak for us.”

Jewish tradition says the Book of Psalms was composed by the First Man-Adam, Melchizedek, Abraham, Moses, Heman, Jeduthun, Asaph, 3 sons of Korah and the largest composer of psalms—King David who is lovingly called “the sweet psalmist of Israel.” Whether all these writers are the right ones is a debate, however all the writers in the 150 psalms written, give us the most compelling, if not heart-wrenching prayers ever spoken. And this is what we call laments.

Even the great Reformer, Martin Luther once said, in a lament “you look into the hearts of the saints” and what you see there is a potent mixture of pain… and hope.” So how about us “modern day believers?” Sandra Richter, author of The Epic of Eden: Book of Psalms Study Guide (which I highly recommend) said, “For a modern believer to pray a lament is to allow the ancients to join you in the midst of your storm.” Wow – your lament is not unheard, nor are you alone in that lament—if you can give it up in prayer. Those who keep lament in keep God out and others whom God places in our lives that are willing to be a source of healing and encouragement.

The two most responses of lament are the outcome of: 1) social persecution, and 2) illness. Sound familiar? Our modern times are not so different from the ancient times. We get blows that knock the even strongest person of faith to their knees. Just think of the 700,000 people who have perished from Covid-19 here in the US, as well as the millions around the world. Many are still suffering long-term effects, isolation, loss, and are in the darkest days of wondering when healing will come.

Or imagine those waiting to find loved ones from the Florida condo collapse. I cannot fathom their isolation of pain! Few, like those waiting for loved ones from 9/11 or a loved one who is MIA, prodigal child, etc, can understand such agonizing wait and soul-turbulence. Situations like this make us think there is either no hand to help, or no hand that can help…and that is where we can turn to our precious Savior who is patient to listen and strong to heal.

Sadly, we have deeper laments that we never give to God. Instead we hide them because it is too hard to share embarrassing or shameful things that invade our lives. Betrayal, slander, bigotry, bullying, addiction, pornography—the categories are vast and in the hours of suffering is when the power of a prayerful lament tips the scales and gives us hope amidst our pain.

There is a common thread in every psalm of lament, here are 5 from known Bible scholars:

  1. An address of praise to God for His mighty acts in the past
  2. A complaint of distress
  3. A protest of innocence
  4. A petition for deliverance and –this last one is most important…
  5. Always a declaration of confidence in God’s faithfulness and a vow to praise Him

One has to admit with wonder that there could be such commonality considering the variety of writers of the psalms! But, like us, they were fellow-humans and we all go through many of the same things no matter where we live or which century we are in.

This acronym sums up the psalms: ACTS—A=adoration, C=confession, T=thanksgiving (or testimony), S=supplication. All these words play a part in every lament as well. In these days of waiting in tough situations, where the wind is knocked out of me, I turn to Psalm 62 over and over again. Read these verses taken from The Voice translation, and ‘listen’ deeply to the cries of the psalm writer:

My soul quietly waits for the True God alone because I hope only in Him.
He alone is my rock and deliverance, my citadel high on a hill—I will not be shaken.
My salvation and my significance depend ultimately on God;
      the core of my strength, my shelter, is in the True God.

Have faith in Him in all circumstances, dear people.
Open up your heart to Him; the True God shelters us in His arms.

Human beings disappear like a breath; even people of rank live artificial lives.
Their weight is that of a breath in a balance—nothing.
      Added together, they’re still lighter than air.
Do not resort to oppression, resist the temptation of ill-gotten gain.
    If you achieve wealth, don’t let your heart get attached.

The True God spoke this once and twice I’ve heard:
That You, the True God, hold all power. Your love never fails, O Lord.

I think Athanasius was spot-on in how the psalms speak for us. I don’t know what you may be going through today, but I do know one thing: God wants your “complaints—laments.” God knows we will go through misery and pain as we live in a sinful and broken world that only God can heal. Many church liturgies use these words, “O God in your mercy, hear my prayer.” Is this not a call for us each day, asking God to hear our laments and with a trusting heart leaving it in God’s capable hands? —Oh indeed so, Amen, come quickly Lord Jesus, AMEN!